Thursday, May 31, 2012

Peace in Christ

Beautiful sunset picture. Gives me peace.
Last night, God spoke to me. I was upset for no reason. I think i was just tired. I was crying in bed, and suddenly I heard a voice saying, " I am in control, do not worry." I was upset because of my status in math and just my every day life has been rotten this year. Yes, rotten. I felt a peace wash over me, something I have not felt in a long time. 
God has been calling out to me for a while. But I chose to ignore it until I was about to break down because of the stress in my life. Something that stresses me out is college. It's 5 years away for me, but I still get worried about that kind of stuff. My mom is telling me that I can get a college degree. But, what if that is not God's plan for my life. My interest is in science and history. But in order to get into college, I have to be good at math. I also have to take the SAT. All of this ahead of me is very stressful and nerve wracking.
I really don't know what God wants me to do with my life. I have always thought that God would lead me into what he wants me to do with my life. But, I am seeing a change. I notice that I make decisions for myself. God brings those decisions into my life and then I make them. Life is stressful, but it doesn't have to be this way. That is why I am glad that in three days I will be done with math. In a few more days after that I will be finished with the rest of my books. I want to be finished, because I need rest and peace from the worries that surround me. I am giving in to my physical and spiritual needs because I know that I need them. I am not quitting, I am just stopping. I know that I can understand math, and that it might just take more time. I wish that was not so. Because I really just don't enjoy math. But, If that is God's will, so be it. I will not change, I will grow.

I have found peace in Christ knowing that he is in charge and is in control of my life. 


Tuesday, May 8, 2012

Private Devotion

I LOVE to steal awhile away
From every cumbering care, 
and spend the hours of setting day
In humble, grateful prayer

I love, in solitude, to shed 
the penitential tear;
And all His promises to plead,
When none but God can hear

I love to think on mercies past,
And future good implore,
And all my cares and sorrows cast
On Him whom I adore

I love, by faith, to take a view,
Of brighter scenes in heaven;
The prospect doth my strength renew
While here by the tempest driven.

Thus, when life's toilsome day is o'er
May its departing ray
Be calm as this impressive hour
And lead to endless day

I'm technically not supposed to be writing on my blog right now. I'm supposed to be memorizing this poem that's due Thursday. I think I have the most of it down. Just think about these words

Sunday, May 6, 2012

Anchors and Rocks.....

O.K., so I found this poem online by Mike Shaw.  It's titled "Anchors and Rocks."

Anchors And Rocks
Keep you safe
Keep you secure
Stop you drifting with the tide
And let you come home
Anchors and rocks
More precious
Than any other stone or metal.

"God is our refuge and strength, an ever-present help in trouble. Therefore we will not fear, though the earth give way and the mountains fall into the heart of the sea, though its waters roar and foam and the mountains quake with their surging. Selah" (Psalm 46:1-3)
 Rocks and Anchors move some, but not very much. What if we were to substitute Jesus in for the anchor, and our mentors for the rocks?  My anchor, Jesus, is the best part of my life. I wake up ready to start the day with Him. But as time goes by, I tend to slip away and get stressed out about finding something or get worried about something and go panicky. That's when I run, away from everything and run home to Jesus. I don't take running lightly either, I AM NOT a runner. I run alot, but something I think about is running to Jesus. Jesus is going to let you come home to Him.
On to the rocks, my rock is my mentors. These people include, my parents, my teachers, my small group leaders, my best christian friends, etc. The people I can trust with everything. I have a REALLY hard time focusing on school at the end of the year and these are the people that I can count on to help me through my trouble in studying.
Precious metals are the people that I watch, but don't really want to follow their example. I'm not one of those crazy middle-school girls who smears makeup on a chases everybody, has a really loud voice(although I really project decently....!!!) I don't participate in every middle-school gathering, I have my best friends and then my friends who aren't really there very often. I generally am a quiet person around people I don't really know.
How many of us really worry about something and can not let it go with out finishing it fully? TOTALLY ME! If I have something due this thursday, and can not find it. I will get SUPER STRESSED OUT! I can only run to god and say, "This is what is going on. Can you help me?"
Recently I read about the word selah. Most scholars think it means to pause. I think it means that this thing that the guy just said was really important. God apparently wants us to understand that he is our refuge and strength in times of trouble.

I'm going to God, I'm running to God, for He is my Anchor.